One year ago on the Feast of Guardian Angels, I mentioned about listening more to my guardian angel. Looking back, it seems that I have not made much progress. I still made the same mistake of not listening to the "little voice" often enough. In the meantime, I began my response to the call of deaconhood.
Throughout the year, there were occasions in which my good will was frustrated. For example, I intended to take 284C to go to the requiem mass for Stephen and I intended to take the bus at its terminus. However, the terminus I had in my mind turned out to be a minibus terminus instead of the big bus. I wasted some time to locate the terminus to no avail. In the end, I had to take the bus at the Yuen Long Main Road. I took for granted the minibus terminus to be the big bus terminus without verifying. Yet, in the whole process, I was not aware of any "little voice" telling me which way to go. Perhaps my guardian angel had attempted to inform me but I was so sure of myself that I was not able to hear from him.
Let me tell you another incident in which I made the same mistake. The deacon aspirants attended a psychological screening by Fr. George Zee, S. J. After a long time, the secretary from the VG Office called us to see the Vicar General for the report. I was nosy and asked the other aspirants, who attended the Holy Spirit Seminary College with me, about their appointments. Somehow, I had the idea that my appointment was earlier than theirs.
Five minutes before the "appointed time", I arrived at the VG Office, only to find that the Vicar General had already flown to Beijing to attend the National Day Celebration. I thought, probably the Vicar General was told to attend at the last minute. His secretary did not have time to inform me to change the date. I did not call up to clarify because I did not expect the secretary to be able to give me another day until the Vicar General returned.
On the National Day, I tore off the calendar for the month of September. This morning, when I looked at the October calendar, I saw the appointment I had written down. Stupid me. The appointment had always been a day in October, not in the last week of September! Throughout the whole process, I did not hear any "little voice" telling me to verify the appointment with the secretary. There must be a purpose behind such an incident. Perhaps my angel wanted me to learn a lesson, learn to be less arrogant and to know my weaknesses better. I should be humble because my mistakes are always before my eyes.
Five minutes before the "appointed time", I arrived at the VG Office, only to find that the Vicar General had already flown to Beijing to attend the National Day Celebration. I thought, probably the Vicar General was told to attend at the last minute. His secretary did not have time to inform me to change the date. I did not call up to clarify because I did not expect the secretary to be able to give me another day until the Vicar General returned.
On the National Day, I tore off the calendar for the month of September. This morning, when I looked at the October calendar, I saw the appointment I had written down. Stupid me. The appointment had always been a day in October, not in the last week of September! Throughout the whole process, I did not hear any "little voice" telling me to verify the appointment with the secretary. There must be a purpose behind such an incident. Perhaps my angel wanted me to learn a lesson, learn to be less arrogant and to know my weaknesses better. I should be humble because my mistakes are always before my eyes.
See that you do not despise one of these little ones; for I tell you that in heaven their angels always behold the face of my Father who is in heaven (Matthew 18:10).
I believe that angels are not limited in space. They are able to stay with me and at the same time, they are always in heaven to behold the face of God. I have to learn to hear from his "small distant voices", especially when I have become a deacon aspirant. May God guide me.
I believe that angels are not limited in space. They are able to stay with me and at the same time, they are always in heaven to behold the face of God. I have to learn to hear from his "small distant voices", especially when I have become a deacon aspirant. May God guide me.
Dear angel, we are all God's master-pieces. Guide me and protect me, lovely angel, that we may serve God in the most meaningful way. Amen.
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