The faith of Jeremiah

Jeremiah was an unpopular prophet. When he opened his mouth, words unpleasant to the ears came out.
For whenever I speak, I cry out, I shout, "Violence and destruction!" For the word of the LORD has become for me a reproach and derision all day long(Jeremiah 20:8).
It is very natural for us to appear good in front of the others. For better ones, they remain in good terms with their neighbour. They do not offend people. For some, they resort to hypocrisy in order to command esteem. However, for the chosen ones of God, they have no choice but staying unpopular. They are true to their call and cannot shut in God's words.
If I say, "I will not mention him, or speak any more in his name," there is in my heart as it were a burning fire shut up in my bones, and I am weary with holding it in, and I cannot (Jeremiah 20:9).
Things can turn really bad. The chosen ones of God can easily become scapegoats, or marginalized or even persecuted.
For I hear many whispering. Terror is on every side! "Denounce him! Let us denounce him!" say all my familiar friends, watching for my fall. "Perhaps he will be deceived, then we can overcome him, and take our revenge on him." (Jeremiah 20:10)
Doesn't it sound familiar? Your bosom friends want to see you fall while you cannot take justice into your hand. Perhaps it is the pain of man only. It cuts and hurts deeply to be betrayed by friends. True to ourselves, we accept these blows without uttering a sigh, maintaining our integrity.

When all supports are gone, God becomes our sole refuge. Perhaps this was how Jesus had gone through patiently his physical as well as spiritual torments. He placed his trust in God, believing that he would be vindicated in the end. Jeremiah showed a similar faith. Of course, Jeremiah belonged to the Old Testament era. He wanted to see revenge exacted. He left it to God.
O LORD of hosts, who triest the righteous, who seest the heart and the mind, let me see thy vengeance upon them, for to thee have I committed my cause(Jeremiah 20:12).
Here, we find a line of prayer repeated in nearly identical wording.
But, O LORD of hosts, who judgest righteously, who triest the heart and the mind, let me see thy vengeance upon them, for to thee have I committed my cause(Jeremiah 11:20).
However, who is righteous? Who can claim to be blameless? Our problem is being stubborn and refuse to turn back.
This morning, I had to turn back. As usual, I went to the McDonald's to say my morning prayer in breakfast. I approached the counter only to discover that I had forgotten to put on my waist belt on which my purse was attached. Now, I had no money, no mobile phone and no Octopus card. Since I have been visiting this McDonald's for a long time, the waiters recognize me. If I insisted and explained to them, I was sure they would allow me to pay later. But what about the remaining of the day? I had to turn back.
I have not gone to confession for quite a while. I feel the need to, but do not gather the resolve to do it. I need to turn back to God, to repent.

Dear Lord, as we are approaching Passion Sunday, let us contemplate Your sufferings. It is our sins that make You suffer. Help me go to confession. Amen.

Appendix:

(Jeremiah 11:20) וַיהוָה צְבָאוֹת שֹׁפֵט צֶדֶק, בֹּחֵן כְּלָיוֹת וָלֵב; אֶרְאֶה נִקְמָתְךָ מֵהֶם, כִּי אֵלֶיךָ גִּלִּיתִי אֶת-רִיבִי
(Jeremiah 20:12) וַיהוָה צְבָאוֹת בֹּחֵן צַדִּיק, רֹאֶה כְלָיוֹת וָלֵב; אֶרְאֶה נִקְמָתְךָ מֵהֶם, כִּי אֵלֶיךָ גִּלִּיתִי אֶת-רִיבִי