常年期第十五主日，甲年
主題：勇氣系列之一：聽的勇氣
今天耶穌說：「有耳的，聽吧！」（瑪13:9）
聽，除了有耳之外，還要有勇氣。
西諺有云：「人非孤島」。倘若人要生存及發展，有賴與其他人建構成的人際網絡，包括：家庭、學校、工作單位、社交圈子…一直擴展到社會國家甚至全世界。正如我們的財政司陳先生所說，我們在香港打一個噴嚏，美國也會受到影響！這種「蝴蝶效應」，今天已經是不用爭辯的常識了！
眾所周知，人際關係的成敗，溝通是決定性的因素。溝通的渠道有很多，當中，聆聽最重要，但亦最容易受到不同的因素干擾！例如，大家看醫生的時候，假如醫生的眼睛祇顧在電腦看你的檢查報告，沒有聽取你的訴苦，連一句話也沒有跟你說，開了藥方便打發你走。即使他是有名的「神醫」，你對他還有信心嗎？你對他的藥方有信心嗎？下次還會再向他求醫嗎？另一方面，倘若你不聽清楚醫生用藥或者戒口的指示，你的病會痊癒嗎？當然，關係有很多種，不一定是助人受助的關係，但關係總有施予和接受，而且施予者和接受者的角色，是可以互換的。雖然今次你是接受者，你總有機會變成施予者。但無論是怎樣的關係，「聆聽」永遠是必須的。相反，偏見、偏聽、缺乏溝通以至產生誤會，祇會令關係惡化，對雙方都沒有好處。
今天，讓我們集中反省影響聆聽的其中一個因素，就是勇氣。接受者一方容易犯上自尊心重的毛病，沒有勇氣聽到身邊的人，或者施予者告訴自己問題的癥結。有人認為自己是太極高手，內功深厚，沒有可能輸在一個無名小卒手上；有人認為自己健康良好，沒有可能生病；有人認為自己是正義的化身，沒有可能做出不道德的行為…做父母的，做慣了施予者，很難接受自己已經老了，需要倚賴子女照顧了！另一方面，施予者容易犯上高高在上的毛病，抱著一種施捨的心態，沒有勇氣聽到接受者說：「我不需要你所提供的這種幫助，這種施捨！」作為父母的，總想給予子女最好的事物。當子女幼少，不懂事，不懂得選擇的時候，父母當然有責任為他們作出選擇。但在不知不覺之間，子女成長了，有了自己的選擇時，做父母最難做到的，莫過於拿出勇氣，聆聽子女的心聲，接受他們拒絕你們所預備最好的禮物！「他們一定是受到壞朋友的影響，或者老師灌輸了錯誤的價值觀，或者從互聯網上接收了教壞人的資訊…」這些祇不過是自我安慰的防禦機制罷了！
現實給生活的人很大的壓力，給予所有人際關係很大的壓力。每一個還有生命氣息的人，會掙扎生存下去。有些人選擇改造環境，改善關係，使它適合自己生存；沒有條件改造環境的，便改造自己去適應環境。面對惡劣的環境，惡劣的關係，有些人選擇壯士斷臂，犧牲部份肢體甚至理想。短線來說，付出最少代價的，莫過於採取對現實「視而不見，聽而不聞」（13:14）的防禦機制，並相信「明天會更好」！殊不知「聽而不聞」，正是破壞人際關係的，破壞生存環境的致命傷！到最後，關閉了所有溝通的渠道，他們惟有逆來順受，聽天由命，作出消極的不合作。
作為生活在香港的天主教徒，我們未必有改造環境的能力；面對社會的動盪，或者疫情的衝擊，我們可能感到無能為力。但我們對天主所許諾的，充滿仁愛公義的天國，仍滿懷望德，絕不會消極地不與政府合作，不與懷有善意的人合作，不與天主合作！最後，我們會放棄天國的理想，放棄耶穌基督所建立的教會嗎？不會！
保祿宗徒說，我們都是耶穌基督的修和大使（格後5：19-20），宣講的福音是真理，這真理能「直穿入靈魂和神魄，關節與骨髓的分離點，且可辨別心中的感覺和思念。」（希4：12）不過，忠言逆耳，例如愛仇人和為迫害你的人祈禱等，不是沒有恩寵的人能夠接受的。想從外面打破那「視而不見，聽而不聞」的防禦機制是困難的。而要聽福音的人放棄這個防禦機制，必需有無比的勇氣和天主聖神的恩寵，纔有能力接受修和的福音，所以不是人人都可以接受，尤其是身負公職的政治人物。基督徒也要接受現實，就是尊重對方的尊嚴與自由。基督徒容易犯上捨我其誰的救世主心態的毛病，沒有勇氣聽到「基督徒是罪人」或者「我不想聽你講耶穌」的現實！
各位兄弟姊妹，作為天主教徒，我們是多麼幸福啊！因為在我們與天父的關係之中，天父永遠是施予者，我們永遠是接受者。不過，天主知道這是不健康的，因為永遠是接受者，永遠不會長大。所以天主會給予每一個人，即使是最不幸，最失敗的人，都有機會成為施予者！在維持天人關係當中，天主最懂得聆聽，不厭其煩地耐心聽取我們的祈禱。反躬自問，我們有勇氣聆聽耶穌基督的教訓嗎？有勇氣接受悔改的邀請嗎？有勇氣做耶穌基督的修和大使嗎？
天主保祐！
2017年講道
論盡神學
圖片鳴謝：mentalhealth.com
Fifteenth Ordinary Sunday, Year A
Theme: Courage Series#1: The Courage To Hear
Today, Jesus says, "Whoever has ears ought to hear." (Matthew 13:9)
Not only do you have ears, but you also need courage to hear.
No man is an island. Our survival and development rely on the interpersonal network we build with others, including family, school, work place, social network … society, country and even the whole world. Just as what our Financial Secretary Mr. Paul says, "USA shall be affected by our sneeze in Hong Kong." This Butterfly Effect is an indisputable common sense nowadays.
As we all know, communication is essential to the success of interpersonal relationships. Among the many channels of communication, listening is the most crucial but is most easily affected by different noises! For example, you consult your physician. What if he never takes his eyes off the computer screen to read your various examination reports and does not listen to your complaints. Furthermore, if without speaking a word to you, he simply sends you away with his prescriptions. Do you have confidence in him, no matter how famous a miracle physician he is? Will you follow his prescriptions, and continue to consult him next time? On the other hand, if you do not listen carefully to his prescriptions or what not to eat, do you think you can be cured? Of course, there are many different kinds of relationships, not necessarily helper and client. But all relationships involve give and take. The roles of giver and taker may interchange. Although you are the taker this time, you always have the opportunity to become the giver. Whatever relationship it is, listening is always essential. On the contrary, prejudice, not listening comprehensively and lack of communication will lead to misunderstanding. When relations sour, both sides suffer.
Today, I want to focus on one particular element which affects listening. It is courage. The taker can easily fall victim to pride and do not have to courage to hear other people or givers mention the gist of the problem. It is unthinkable for a Tai Chi master to be knocked out by a nobody in twenty seconds, for a healthy person to fall sick, for a righteous person to get involved in sexual scandals … parents who have always been givers find it difficult to accept their own ageing and need to be taken care of by children! On the other hand, givers can easily fall victim to a condescendence attitude and do not have the courage to hear the takers say, "I don't need the kind of help you give!" Parents always want to give children the best. When they were young and didn't know what to choose, it was the duty of parents to choose for them. But imperceptibly, children have grown up and have their own choices. The most challenging job for parents is to take the courage to hear the rejection of the best gifts they have prepared for them! "It must be the fault of bad peers, or teachers instilling wrong values or immoral information picked up from the Internet …" All these are but defence mechanisms to soothe oneself!
Reality puts great pressure on living things and on all interpersonal relationships. Every living creature must struggle to survive. Some choose to change the environment, or improve relationships to make them suitable for their survival. Those who lack the resources to change the environment will change themselves to adapt. Confronted by hostile environment or relationships, some choose to sacrifice part of their limbs or ideals. In the short run, the defence mechanism of "look but not understand, look but never see" (13:14) and belief in a better tomorrow will cost the least! Unbeknown to them that this defence mechanism is the very Achilles' heel that destroys interpersonal relationships and the survival environment! In the end, closing up all communication channels, one can only suffer passively and become uncooperative.
As Catholics living in Hong Kong, we may not have the resources to change the environment. Facing social unrests and the pandemic, we may feel helpless. But we still have hope in the Kingdom of Heaven which is full of love and righteousness promised by our God. We shall not passively refuse to cooperate with the government, with people of good will and with God! In the end, shall we abandon the ideal of the Kingdom of Heaven and abandon the Church established by Jesus Christ? Never!
St. Paul says that we are reconciliation ambassadors of Jesus Christ (2 Corinthians 5:19-20). The gospel we proclaim is the Truth. This Truth "is living and effective, sharper than any two-edged sword, penetrating even between soul and spirit, joints and marrow, and able to discern reflections and thoughts of the heart." (Hebrews 4:12) But the Word of God is hard to swallow, e.g. love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you etc. It is difficult for people without grace to receive. It is difficult to break down the defence mechanism of "hear and not understand, look and not see" from the outside. It is even more difficult for listeners of gospel to forsake this defence mechanism without great courage and the grace from the Holy Spirit, in particular, politicians. We Christians must also accept the reality and respect the dignity and freedom of our listeners. We easily make the mistake of playing Saviour and do not have the courage to accept the reality that "Christians are sinners" or "We don't want you to talk Jesus"!
Brethren! We Catholics are blessed! In our relationship with our heavenly Father, He is always the giver and we the takers! However, God knows that it is unhealthy to always be takers because takers shall never grow up. Thus, God gives everybody, even if you are the most unlucky and worst loser, the opportunity to be giver! In maintaining the God-man relationship, God always listens attentively and patiently to our prayers. Let's ask ourselves, do we have the courage to hear the teachings of Jesus Christ, the courage to accept the invitation to repent, and the courage to become reconciliation ambassadors of Jesus Christ?
God bless!
